I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
there was a trapeze. enough said
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
