Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize