omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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