you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
