Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
