Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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