drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
