the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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