Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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