Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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