Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
