Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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