Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
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