What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize