I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize