We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Randomize
