I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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