His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
