that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
