Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
