I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
