margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
