It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
