Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
