Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
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