I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
