Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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