the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
