it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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