Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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