After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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