Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I didn't notice because vodka
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
