Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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