He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
We don't watch enough power rangers
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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