does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
