This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
