i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
