She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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