Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
