I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
