the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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