We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
