i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
