You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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