Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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