I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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