listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
vagina is talking i cant
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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