True but thats because hes a fetus.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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