What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
