life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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