hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
