Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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